I’m standing here ironing my clothes for the week and talking to the Lord about the craziness that my life is. The decisions that may be comin up. The path the Lord is taking me down.
Tears start runnin down my face because I just want to do what He wants. To be where He wants me to be. To know what step to take tomorrow.
CS Lewis says-“If I discover within myself a desire which no experience in this world can satisfy, the most probable explanation is that I was made for another world”
And some days the wait for the other world is a lot. To long to see His face fully. It makes my heart squeeze.
But for this place…to live a life all for Him and in the middle of where He wants. If only I could get the road map emailed, I’ll take snail mail too.
I know I may sound hard on myself. But when I am disatisfied I often see God stirring something in my heart. And when my world is in upheaveal I see it is the time for God to speak loudest. And right now my life feels completely upheaved. Maybe it’s that at some point everyday for the last 3 wks except one day I have worked. Maybe I need a really super long nap. Maybe a vacation. But in my heart I think God is stirring.
Today I am thankful for friends-far away but close to my heart. Those that pray for me without me asking. And loving on me from a distance. Welcoming me.
And bummer-i checked ticket prices for Uganda yesterday since state has come and I might actually get to take some time off. They have gone up for tourist season. So now I can’t go. Ugggh. And gas is 3.40. Stink. But I know all in God’s perfect amazing time. Now if He could just send me that itinerary. Oh wait. If I knew I might just have a heart attack because I’d freak out. Sooo yeah. I will just go with how He’s doing it.
Happy Sunday.
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